Conticent
by risokura
Summary: I feel like during this time, when there's a certain silence about the world, I feel the most at peace. AxelRoxas AU.


**Disclaimer: **I don't own Kingdom Hearts

**A/N: **Request for _**inuliedelfenx**_. They wanted to see something written from Axel's point of view in the _Inertia Creeps/Three Changes_ verse. Universe? Whatever. You get what I mean.

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**Conticent**

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_6:09AM. _

The numbers on Roxas's alarm clock are bright, red and obnoxious—like me—in the semi darkness of our room. I sigh, closing my eyes and allowing myself to settle into the warmth under the sheets. As always for the past week or so, I'm up earlier than intended. It's becoming something of a habit these days. Not that I mind, I prefer early mornings more than anyone else thinks.

Seriously, if you ask Zexion or Demyx (though, he's really not one to talk) about my sleeping habits, they'll tell you that it's a bitch to get me out of bed. I can't count how many times I've been dragged out of my room by my ankles to a rehearsal or recording session. Back when Marluxia was still with us, he and Zexion used to exchange days on who they were in charge of waking up that morning. I'd prefer Zexion to Marluxia any day. At least Zexion didn't purposely make sure my head hit any walls while I was being dragged on the floor.

Anyway, I'm by no means a morning person. But, I do love the time of day right before the sun rises. You know, when the sky gets really light and the birds are chirping and all that nice, warm and fuzzy shit. Even when my eyes feel like I've rolled them around in dirt and sand and pushed them back into my eye sockets, I never want to go back to sleep.

I don't know, I feel the most alive when there's barely anyone around if that makes any sense. I mean, of course, living in New York City there's _always _going to be someone around. But, I feel like during this time, when there's a certain silence about the world, I feel the most at peace. Well, besides when I'm with the little blonde that I'm currently sharing a bed with, of course.

Roxas's left arm was tightly wound into the sheets that were pooled around my hips and he had a hunk of my pajama pants—I really don't know how—in his hands. He's been doing this a lot lately. When we fall asleep he starts intertwining himself within my arms and legs, trying to fit against me in the most awkward of positions. He always says it's _my _fault, so I just laugh and smile at the faint blush that crosses his face when I tease him about it. He blushes way too easily around me, it's ridiculous sometimes. I'm pretty sure if you say my name to him, he'll start blushing. Okay, no, I'm lying about that. But, it is endearing in a way.

I turned slightly to look over my shoulder at him and felt a smile pulling at the corner of my mouth. We haven't had the chance to sleep much in the past couple of days. I mean, with moving into the new loft and everything. Rox's been pretty stressed out with making sure all the proper paper work has been filed and whatnot. Me? I've been taking a back seat to this entire thing. Roxas becomes a neurotic control freak when it comes to these types of things and I stay out of the way for the sake of my sanity.

Granted, _I _was the one that found this place. But, he was the one that jumped on it when we first saw it. Roxas was also the one that came up to me, biting his lip and avoiding eye contact with me when he asked me to move in with him. After he quit working for his father right after his birthday this year, Roxas became distant like he always does when there's something on his mind. It wasn't too soon before he was telling me that he was thinking about moving. The next day, he asked me to move in with him.

To be honest, I had been thinking of moving out of the loft me, Dem and Zex shared for a while now. We'd gotten that place right after Marx had walked out on us. It was great when we were twenty two, but I was going to be turning twenty five in a few months. I needed something different … something more intimate? Or … singular? Whatever. I just needed my own space. And so, two months later, this is where we Roxas and I had settled—all moved into our new and spectacular love den.

It's been a process. Not one that I particularly enjoyed it half the time because Roxas can be a snappy little bitch when he wants to. But, the end result is always better than the road to getting there, right? Or whatever. I mean, we've still got a ton of shit to unpack … all of which we can do whenever we get around to it. Zex and Dem said they'd come over and help us out, but I don't want to rely on them for too much seeing as they already did enough with helping us move everything into this place. Not only that, Roxas would probably throw a fit, too. He doesn't like relying on people for anything and I'm pretty sure he would say something like:

"_We're not invalids, Axel. We'll be fine on our own_."

And then he'll make sure to narrow his eyes and try to look all menacing and intimidating, when in actuality, all he really looks like is a cuddly midget. And then depending on my mood I might agree with him and leave it at that _or _I'll tease him about his height and deliberately say something stupid like:

"_Ooo, look. Me Roxas. Me manly. Can make home by self_."

…And then he'll probably punch me in the shoulder or something. Roxas still hasn't grasped the concept of _vocalizing _his feelings. He'd rather punch someone or just ignore them all together. Well, at least when it comes to me, at least. I don't know which is more endearing. When he gets all fussy and violent or when he's nearly two seconds away from blushing himself to death. I think both to some degree, actually.

I turned my attention away from Roxas and to the window in front of me. The light from the sun was starting to creep into the room through the blinds, cascading light pressing down into darkness. I reached down to intertwine my fingers with his fingers and slowly loosened the attachment he had on my pajama pants. Roxas huffed in irritation and rolled over onto his back. When he settled back into bed, I rose slowly from my side and made my way over to the window. I shifted the blinds just so I could peer down into the street.

There were a few people walking about, no doubt on their way to work or wherever it is people have to go at six thirty on a Thursday morning. I closed the blinds and walked away from the window toward the center of the room and glanced about at all the boxes that currently littered the floor. We didn't get any further than putting my bed up last night. Roxas … was pretty adamant about keeping my bed. Hell, I was too. There was no way in hell I could get rid of this thing. It was too damn comfortable and I think it was pretty evident that Roxas thought so too.

I turned to the door to find a long box that contained one of my guitars propped up beside it. I haven't really been playing much since the whole vocal cyst business. I mean, I've got no reason not to anymore. I'm done with all that shitty therapy shit and the doctors pretty much gave me the okay to go back to work again. I think I've lost my inspiration of sorts. I don't know, I'm in a bit of a rut right about now.

It's kind of odd considering how the last year and a half has been for me. Meeting Roxas, befriending Roxas, looking out for Roxas, getting cozy with Roxas, somewhat …falling in love with Roxas. Roxas. Roxas, Roxas, Roxas. Isn't there some stupid ideology that's like when you meet someone you really like or some shit they're supposed to become a muse for you or something? I hardly think the fans would want to hear an entire album of shitty, sappy, romance songs, though. That's just not us. That's just not _me_.

Plus, Roxas would probably kill me if he knew about it. As cool as everyone has been with our relationship, I know he's insecure about some stuff. Hell, I am to some degree, too. But, it's whatever. We'll get through whatever comes our way. We've come this far, haven't we? And like I said to him last year on my birthday, we'll keep going at this for however long it takes.

I heard jingling by the doorway and smiled when I saw who was poking their head into our bedroom. I crouched down on the floor and patted at Soro to come near me. She came racing my way and jumped excitedly into my lap. I find it hilarious that Sora pushed Soro off on Roxas when the two of them moved out of their old apartment. I love dogs, so I don't care either way. But I know Roxas wasn't too happy about the arrangement. I know she's grown on him, though. He just won't admit to loving the little spaz even though he does.

After she stopped spazzing out in my lap, she hopped off and made her way over to Roxas's side of the bed and looked up expectantly as she began wagging her tail. When Roxas didn't appear, she began whining and then made her way back over to me again. I scratched her behind the ears as she looked up at me expectantly.

"Sorry, babe. Your favorite person in the whole wide world is still sleeping."

She sneezed, looked behind her and then made her way out of the bedroom again. After I watched Soro leave the room, I rose to my feet again and walked over to the long box propped up against the wall. I glanced quickly at the bed to see that Roxas was still fast asleep and then slowly pulled the tape off of the top of the box. I laid it down on the floor and pulled the guitar out. Figured as much, it was my Gibson Shark Fin. I kicked the box off to the side and propped myself up along the side of the bed with the guitar in my lap. Not that I was in the mood to play it, I just wanted to sit with it for the moment.

I wonder when this place will start to feel like home. When we unpack everything? Probably not, it'll take longer than that. I don't even know why I'm asking myself that question right now. We've barely been in the place for a day. I don't know, I guess I'm anxious … anxious and excited. And I'm over thinking shit. What the fuck, that's Roxas's department.

"Axel?"

I jumped slightly when I felt the mattress sink near my shoulders. Turning around, I saw Roxas leaning over the side, his blue eyes glassy with sleep. I smiled at him and set the guitar off to the side. "Well, look who's up. Morning sleepy head."

He frowned. Even in the early morning, Roxas is _never _without his ever present and ever charming frown. "Do you have any idea what time it is?"

"Last time I checked it was almost seven."

"It _is _seven." Roxas replied, yawning and rubbing at his eyes. "What in the world are you doing up?"

"Couldn't sleep." I replied, turning away from him. "You?"

"The bed …" He pulled the sheets down over his head and lowered himself against the bed. He seemed like he was having reservations about what he was about to say to me. "The bed feels … cold. It's cold. Come back to bed."

"Oh?" I asked bemusedly, "Cold is it? Is that why you were holding onto my pajama pants for dear life? Guess they were pretty warm, weren't they?"

"Why do you have to be such a retard?"

"You make it too easy."

Roxas rolled his eyes at me and glanced down at the guitar by my thigh, "Have you started playing again?"

I shook my head, "Not really." I turned to look up at the window, "I was watching the sunrise for a bit. It was really … bright this morning. Summer's going to be here soon. The days are getting longer, too."

"Mmm." Roxas replied, raising up slightly to look at the window too.

"I was also thinking about a few things …" I shrugged, "But they're really not all that important. Just the ramblings of my mind."

"Axel?" Roxas questioned.

"Really, I was just thinking of how we got here. And I was just thinking how different things are going to be and whatnot. Not like it's a bad thing or whatever, but just … still thinking about it all the while." I turned around to look at him, "So, stop frowning at me."

"I'm not frowning."

"Right and I'm a natural brunet." I rose to my feet and nodded at him, "Now, roll back over so I can get in and warm up the bed again, Princess."

Roxas spent five minutes trying to glare me to death after I settled back into bed with him. My guitar lay discarded, forgotten on the floor and I was starting to feel a bit tired again. Roxas had sidled up to my side, laying his head against my shoulder and I was on my back staring up at the ceiling.

I turned to glance at the window and saw the sun had changed position again. The sky would probably be turning completely blue by now and the city would rise once again. In what remained of the early morning silence with Roxas's steady breathing at my side, there was something. Something that was bound to come out of all of this. Not now, not tomorrow. I didn't know when, nor did I care to know. All I cared about was the moment I was experiencing now. For now, I would sleep again, leaving behind whatever thoughts I had had as the silence disapaited from the city.


End file.
